kinda sick of blogging liao... seems no one reading also... probably wont update so much liao... I think readers out there are yawning when reading my blog... and probably as sick as me... cos I am forever in eeyore mood... sorry ar.. but that's how I am borned to be...

few weeks ago.. I told dear that I might want to throw a mini party for myself on my bday... (ok I know from now till my bday still have abt 7mths+... I think too far liao..) this year my bday just nice falls on saturday... I was thinking abt having a bbq... wanted to invite all my frens... from pri sch to poly... wanna meet up with those frens that I haven meet them for ages... I was so excited abt it... but gals are fickled-minded... 3 min passion. maybe only me ba... now dun feel like doing so... cos I'm afraid that history will repeat itself... I'm so scared that whateva happen on my 21st bday will happen again on my 23rd bday... though I yearned for frens ard me to celebrate my bday... still a part of me is afraid to try...

had a dream last night... dreamt abt the past again... dreamt abt ex again... ming, minghui and jac all are in my dreams... seems like a flash back... those happy times that we once shared... how and why we call ourselves as allies... how we used to go out in a group... how I got attached... how our friendship started to fall apart becos of some misunderstandings (or maybe there isnt any).. how I was back in singlehood and made alot of frens (now I cant seems to find back these frens) etc... everything seems just happened yesterday... those memories still fresh in my mind even though all these happened 3-5 years ago... how I wish I can forget abt all those completely... cos whenever I dreamt of them, my heart aches.. and I misses those days... misses my singlehood life...